Sunday, November 20, 2011

Thomas Hayden Mitchell

My sweet boy is here. He is perfect, he is pink, he is squirmy, he is mine. Here is the story of his arrival.

Austin and I went for our 38 week appointment on October 19 at 10:00. Dr. Dulaney was called to the hospital for a birth so we had to wait until 12:30 to be seen. I sent Austin to the store and I waited in the waiting room, eating an apple I found in my purse. Yay for hidden snacks. There was some super obnoxious girl in the waiting room who wanted to tell me all about her pregnancy and all the pains she was feeling. She also wanted to tell me all about her husband, how she was a couponer, how she sold AVON, and on and on and on. So I was considerably excited when Dr. Dulaney came back. They checked my blood pressure and it was a bit higher than normal...probably because I was nervous about talking to Dr. Dulaney about getting baby boy out...and from listening to chatty baby mama in the waiting room for 2 hours. When Dr. D came in the room, she asked me the usual "How are you feeling?" questions and I unloaded on her. I told her that due to the due date confusion, the high blood pressure, and everything that happened last time that I was not comfortable going any past the 24th and I'd go sooner if she was cool with it. She is wonderful and listened to my feelings and responded perfectly. She said she always listened to a momma's gut feelings and that she was glad I told her how I felt. I was not really dilated much more...only like a 2. We went back to the ultrasound room to do the biophysical profile. He was perfect as always with his sweet precious hand all balled up by his face like it always was. She said she had good news and good news. He scored perfectly on his BPP, but his fluid was a little low. That meant that she was sending us across the street to have a baby. She said he was telling us that he was ready and it was time for him to come on. We were shocked and excited...even though we went in there wanting her to say he could be born, we weren't really expecting to go any earlier than Monday. We didn't have any bags, our house was a wreck, and the carseat was still in Thomas's closet at home.

We went across to Methodist Germantown (which is fabulous) and got all checked in to deliver. I remember nervous laughter and giddiness from both of us. This was really happening. Austin commented on how much different this hospital arrival was compared with last time. A nurse (Jamie) took us back to my room and got us all settled in. We had trouble starting my IV since my blood pressure was a little elevated. I still have a fabulous bruise on my arm where one of my veins blew out. Jamie brought me the form to sign for an epidural and c-section should I need one and she handed me a LuLu's pen to sign the form with. Ha...we're famous! I asked her how she had this pen and she looked at me all weird and said "It's a store in Oxford." I said "I know! It's MY store in Oxford." Anyway, I sent Austin out to get himself some lunch and I got all settled in. The plan was to start me on Cervadil around 6:00 to start dilating my cervix. They'd leave that in for 12 hours and then start Pitocin around 7:00 am if I needed it. Austin came back and hour or so later with gifts and Shelley. She was coming in from Arkansas and we were excited to see a happy, familiar face. Austin is so sweet and had been down in the gift shop trying to find Thomas and I a gift. He bought Thomas a really bright striped sock monkey and he bought me a Willow Tree figure of a Momma holding her baby. He was really proud of himself and he made me a very happy girl...we're so lucky to have him.

By now, it's around 5:00 and they told me I could order supper from downstairs before they started the Cervadil. I ordered and then Austin and I decided that he'd go home and get all of our stuff since I'd pretty much just be laying there and resting until the morning. We clearly weren't aware what Cervadil does to my body! They inserted it around 6 and I settled in with a Storage Wars marathon. Momma and Daddy got there around 8:00 right when the fireworks started. The cervadil pretty much threw me into full force labor. I started freaking out that Austin wasn't back, making the contractions that much worse. I was a big weenie and got a dose of Stadol to slow things down and ease the pain a little. Austin got back around 9:00 and Mimi and Pop headed to Oxford to get some rest. I was able to sleep off and on until about 2:00. I woke up to go to the bathroom, feeling pretty good. I got back in the bed and felt a pop...same pop as when my water broke with Andrew except for I didn't feel the gush. I woke Austin up and told him I thought my water had broken...he sleepily freaked out. I paged the nurse and told her I thought my water had broken. She came in to check me and didn't feel anything or see any fluid. We figured I was crazy...I tried to go back to sleep. Two seconds later I felt a huge gush and then one giant massive freaking contraction. Game Time! We called Corinne...her and Mimi hopped in the car and started on their way. I wanted to stay on the monitor the whole time so I wasn't able to move through the contractions making them super super painful. I got an epidural and was able to deal pretty much until the morning. Morning came and the back labor got pretty intense. Thomas was posterior (face-up) so he had to do a lot of corkscrewing to get out making the labor pains super painful in my back. We tried lots of different positioning and lots of pushing to get him to turn. The nurses were amazing...letting me try all different positions that would never have been considered in Oxford. He turned and was born at 11:21 am. He gave us a bit of a scare at first. His cry was really weak and wet sounding so they took him over pretty quickly to the isolette. They deep suctioned him and even had to bag him. They called out for NICU to come and I, quite naturally, freaked the eff out. I kept saying, "Is he okay? Is he okay?" I just knew that we were doing all of this over again and I felt completely terrified. They all reassured me that he was fine and I soon heard a big loud cry and saw him pink up. They brought him over to me and I got to nurse and snuggle right away. My momma heart was super full. I felt all warrior woman and I'm considerably proud that I was able to deliver such a big posterior baby vaginally.

We're a month old today...I know I'm super late posting about all of this. We've settled in really well to baby life. Thomas is wonderful and we couldn't be more in love with the sweet boy. We've definitely had some growing pains. The first few days were marked with some serious sadness. We were both slammed with reminders of what we had really missed with Andrew, guilt for anything we could have done differently, and just the void of knowing our family was still incomplete. Then, the hammer fell and we got the news about sweet Walker's death. I don't think I put Thomas down at all the day we found out. I felt so grateful for what I held in my arms...I know that void that Chris and Christine so freshly felt in their hearts.

I'm not making any promises, but I'm going to try to post fairly regularly so I can look back on these first months and remember all that we did. I've got to run now because my son is growling at me that he's hungry. I'll happily go get my boy.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

A sad goodbye

I began blogging about my sweet Thomas's birth earlier this morning, but I can't post it yet. I can't blog about his beautiful arrival while my family is in the midst of such deep mourning. My sweet baby cousin, Walker, died Sunday in a terrible car wreck along with two of his friends. They were coming back to Oxford to attend church with their pledge class. He was only 19 years old. He had come home to spend the weekend with his family to celebrate his Momma's birthday. This is unbelievably heartbreaking. The shock of it all is almost too much to comprehend. I can't imagine the pain his parents and siblings must be feeling. I know the pain of losing a child, but I don't know the pain of losing a child that I raised for 19 years...watched grow and thrive and live. I didn't have to tell his 14 year old sister and 17 year old brother that their brother died. I didn't have to do so many unspeakable things that Chris and Christine are going to have to do. My grandparents, both 80, are having to deal with so much unfair that they have to do this so late in life. Walker, Martin, and Megan light up their world. They have spent every Christmas Eve with those kids since Walker was born and now what?? How do you cope with that kind of loss?

Charles Walker were such an amazing kid. Becoming such an amazing man. You never shied away from a hug, giving me one at every arrival and departure. I saw you walking on the Square just a few short weeks ago, looking all cute and grown up with your head full of curly blond hair. You gave our family nothing but happiness and I am so proud to be your cousin. Your soccer coach mentioned that you left his team better than you found it. You did the same thing in the world and in our family. We will always love you, always miss you.